Communicating can defuse possible financial conflicts with your sibling

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Effective communication can defuse many potential financial conflicts. Find out how.

If the parents seem to have a financial bias towards a sibling

Wrong approach“Asking your favorite child to help with medical bills?” You always give him money, not me.

Good approach“You always seem to help her, but when I needed money, you didn’t. Why is that?”

Sibling animosity could be due to the real or perceived preferential treatment of parents. It is better to have a frank conversation, because it is possible that your brother asked or forced your parents to give money, when you did not ask for it and they were not aware of it. your problem. There may be a valid reason for your parents’ actions. You should clarify.

When a sibling makes bad financial decisions

Wrong approach“You are stupid when it comes to investing and you always lose money. I won’t bail you out every time.

Good approach“You should learn how to invest or hire a professional. If you want I can help you.”

Even if the sibling makes bad choices, you may just not want to interfere in their life. But if you have the expertise, you should offer help. If, however, he relies on you to rescue him every time, it is better to offer him help and refuse money.

When you need financial help but your brother or sister refuses

Wrong approach“You have too much self-esteem just because I fell on bad times. Keep your money!”

Good approach“I hope you too don’t have financial problems. I will take out a loan or seek help from someone else.

Unless there’s been a long-standing quarrel, chances are your sibling will help you through the tough times. If they can’t, don’t assume the worst and ask clearly. Even if he has a lot more money than you, he may be facing a big loss, or maybe his wife isn’t in favor of the move. Just speak.

When the brother refuses to refund the money

Wrong approach“I know I shouldn’t have helped you. You are an ingrate and I will never give you money again.

Good approach“I expected you to return my money last month, but let me know if you need more time.”

It is very likely that your brother or sister has forgotten or is still not out of the woods. It’s best to have a civil conversation with him before jumping to conclusions. A gentle reminder is all he needs to return the money and there’s no point in aggravating the situation unnecessarily.

If the spouse refuses to help the sibling

Wrong approach“Of course, your wife is more important than me now. I mean nothing to you.

Good approach: “You don’t have to force yourself to help me if it disrupts your married life.”

It’s common for a spouse to refuse to help a sibling, and it’s best not to force the situation or ask him to help you on the sly. This will further fuel the quarrel and create differences between you and your brother.

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